RED FLAGS in in the beginning of ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS!

Who never met an interesting person to date and soon started to get frustrated about the way the relationship progressed? This happens when we build expectations and ignore the red flags!

Usually red flags are there from the first day, but when we meet someone we like, our mind gets busy building a castle of dreams about how wonderful that relationship would be, and we end up not seeing the alarming signs even they are pretty obvious. We ignore the red flags instead of recognizing them!

On this post I will be talking about things that you should pay attention from the beginning of a romantic relationship to avoid major disappointments in the future. I made a list with 4 behaviors for you to observe that might help you to identify the red flags.

When you know what you are looking for, your mind can immediately identify it, so I hope next time that you observe one of this behaviors, an alarm goes off in your head “pay attention, proceed with caution!”, and who knows this might help you to avoid your heart from being broken again!

Lack of Interest

I have as rule in any kind of relationship that interest or lack of it, transpires!

Next time you catch yourself giving excuses, saying that someone is too busy to send you a message, just be very honest with yourself and consider the fact that maybe the person is not interested in you at all!

And don’t take it personally, perhaps their attention is on other aspect of their life, like career, health or family. Maybe they are even connected to someone else, you never know… Just don’t think that the problem is with you!

A good way to measure the interest that someone has on you, is to observe how much they are investing, how many messages they send, how deep they are, and even how much time they are willing to spend with you.

Words X Action

Pay more attention to actions than to words! Some people tend to say things like:

“When you meet my mum…”
“When you come to my place…”
“When we travel together…”
“We could go to that place…”
“We could do that together…”

It’s a problem when people say these kind of things because they give the impression that they want to have a serious relationship with you! And if you like them, probably you will believe, buy the idea and build dreams!

I can tell you from my own personal experience, every time I met someone that liked to talk a lot, nothing ever happened. People that truly want to be with you don’t talk, they act! They pick up the phone, call you and ask if you are free and willing to do something.

So next time you meet someone that likes to talk, don’t buy the idea! Actions speak louder than words! So pay attention to them!

Previous Relationships

Always observe how people talk about their previous lovers and pay attention to 3 things:

1 – Did they overcome their “exes”?

How would you know? Just observe how they talk about their past relationships, if they get a bit overwhelmed or even emotional, probably they didn’t overcome yet, and it might indicate that there’s no room to connect with you.

2 – What’s the pattern of previous relationships, healthy or toxic?

When people have a lot of dysfunctional relationships, is a good indication that they are not emotionally healthy, because if they were, they would never put up with this kind of relationship.

People only manage to stay together for some time if they vibrate in the same frequency. An emotionally healthy person would never be able to sustain for too long a relationship with someone that is unhealthy. It’s a matter of compatibility where alike attracts alike!

Observe as well if there is a repetition pattern in these relationships and ask yourself if that’s what you want, or if you are willing to teach them a different way of having a relationship. Sometimes these patterns are all they know because they are being ruled by their subconscious mind programs.

3 – How do they talk about their “exes”?

Pay attention if they speak respectfully about their past lovers because it reveals a lot about their character and personality they have, and you don’t want to date someone that doesn’t respect who they liked someday. Besides, there are good chances they might talk about you like that in the future!

Desperate for a Relationship

I get very suspicious when someone is too desperate for a relationship, or when they want to commit too soon, like on the second or third date.

There is a huge difference between someone that wants to be with you and the relationship just happens as a consequence, and someone that wants to have a relationship and you are just the person that is willing to give it to the person.

Usually, single people that want a relationship behave in 2 different ways. On one side you have those that are enjoying life and would love to have someone to share the journey, but it’s ok if they don’t meet anyone because life goes on anyway. On the other side, you have those that are living life in autopilot, and keep dreaming and waiting to meet someone in order to start enjoying life.

Now you tell me, if you would choose a person to date, would prefer someone from the first or the second group? And if you are single, which group are you?

Did you understand why I get suspicious when I meet people that are too desperate to have a relationship? It makes me wonder how they are living life and if they are depending on someone to be happy.

It’s great that people want to commit, but not on the second or third date. This shows that the person wants to make the relationship happen in a forced way, and that’s not how healthy relationships work!

Healthy relationships happen when two people like each other and want to spend more time together, to the point of building a relationship and committing to it, even without having a verbal agreement!

Of course there are many other red flags that could be on this list, if you want to collaborate, please share your ideas in the comments. Maybe this compilation might help some people to avoid a broken heart!